Fallen (Fawks)

[tori]

Heaven bent to take my hand, nowhere left to turn.
I'm lost to those I thought were friends, to everyone I know.
Oh they turned their heads embarassed, pretend that they don't see.
But it's one missed step, you'll slip before you know it.
And there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed.
I've fallen...

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A week.

It had been a week since she had managed to escape Logan's grip, a whole seven days since either blow or insult had wounded her body and pride. For most, this would seem like such a miniscule accomplishment. But for Tori... for Tori, this was as though someone told her she had won the lottery. All she had ever wanted was right at her fingertips.

And she couldn't be more happy.

Well, no... that wasn't completely true. Tori was happy, but she was also lonely. And, though she was distrustful of those around her, that did not mean that she was antisocial. She enjoyed talking to others; she wanted to make a friend, or find someone she could maybe trust. She knew not everyone was cruel, but there had been too many people like that in her life for her to even consider opening up and gaining a friend.

A friend was something she would have killed for. A true friend, not one of those that found you only when she wanted to gossip, or when he wanted advice about the girl he liked. She wanted someone she could confide in, and that she could actually trust. But most around the circus were busy with the friends they already had. That or they were trying to work on their routines. Either way, there were too many blocks between her and a friend.

That was why she was sitting beside the campfire, in the middle of the night, with only herself and the puppy she had found just the other day. It had been so small, so tiny, and was missing one leg. It was more pathetic than she was. Tori had taken one look, and had known she had to care for it. Now, she and the pup, who she had jokingly named Kitten, were inseperable.

It eased the loneliness, if only a bit.

[brianalunsford]

Well, I've got a mind full of wicked designs, I've got a non-stop-whole in my head-imagination.
I can't forget I am the sole architect; I built the shadows here, I built the growl in the voice I fear.
You know me now, but to do better than that you've got to follow me!
Boy, I'm trying to show you where I'm at...

Hey, pretty, don't you wanna take a ride with me, through my world?
Hey, pretty, don't you wanna kick and slide with me, through my world?

Fox was out of alcohol.

In a way, that was a good thing. He knew he relied too heavily on the stuff; it wasn't a good idea for him to keep that habit up every single night, especially not since the Cirque had more then a few minors hanging about. One of the more crafty ones could sneak into his stash and take anything they liked, and he'd never know the difference.

Hell, he wouldn't have been surprised if that had already happened once before.

But it was also a bad thing. No buzz meant nothing to dilute his thoughts; he was completely vulnerable to anything his mind could cook up, and half the things his mind cooked up were related to events he'd rather not recall.

Which was why he was out, next to the campfire again, rather then in his tent and sleeping like he was supposed to be doing (he had to help with setting up the Cirque in the morning; that was the only reason his normally nocturnal patterns had been disrupted). The sounds of familiar people around him were enough to calm him considerably, and the flames were enough to distract his attention.

But that's when he saw her, across the flames. She was a new recruit, if he remembered correctly, someone they had picked up in the last town. Fox gave a crooked grin. It wasn't often he got to talk to new people, and, well... it was always polite to introduce yourself.

He stood, moving to go sit beside her.

"'Ello," he said, giving her a good-natured, crooked smile. "Are being new, yes? Not thinking I was ever catching your name. Am being Rurik Yakovitch, but everyone is calling me Fox."

[tori]

"'Ello. . ."

Tori jumped as soon as the voice broke through her silent solitude. Her hands reached out, snatched up the chihuahua puppy she had grown so attached to and clutched it to her breast, as if it was a baby and not a puppy. Her wide eyes locked onto the man who had spoken to her, scanned his form with enough attention to detail to make any detective proud. 

She was too scared to do anything but. Tori had let him get this close to her, far too close to her, without her noticing. It was something that she had never allowed before. She always noted when people got too close to her, and prepared just in case they decided to take a swing. It was own personal form of security. 

It took her a moment to realize he had asked for her name, and swallowed down her fear so she could reply. She recognized him now. He was one of the performers, one who doubled as a roustabout. He was the exact opposite of her position. 

"Vic... Victoria," she murmured, her voice quiet, shaky. She dropped her eyes. "But everyone calls me Tori."

[brianalunsford]

Fox raised a brow as she flinched back. He was used to newbies being skittish, but not... quite that skittish. He held up both his hands in front of his chest, moving back a bit as well, to show her he had no weapons and he meant no harm. He'd just wanted to start a conversation, that was all.

"'Ey, 'ey, not going to hurt you, ptichka," the Russian said, somewhat quietly, mismatched eyes softening as he gave her a look-over. She was thinner then him -- and that was saying something. "Or your dog. Here, actually, having..." He reached down into his pockets, rummaging a bit before pulling out a milkbone. His act had dogs occasionally; he knew how to train them, and he knew to always carry treats. "...having a treat. If he... she?... is wanting it."

The crooked smile returned, this time more to be reassuring then anything else. She seemed like a nice girl, really; just... timid. Extremely timid. Softly, he added, "Is nice to be meeting you, Wictoria. Vill... vill be calling you Tori, as well, if it is being okay with you."

[tori]

He reached into his pocket, and Tori immediately cringed back again, holding the dog tighter to her chest. She didn't want him to hurt her, or the pup, and she definitely didn't trust him, no matter what he said. Any man could roll a lie off of his tongue, and Tori knew a few who could do it quite easily. Especially when it came to their hands and her body. She learned long ago never to trust anyone with her body. 

The man offered out a treat, and Kitten immediately started to wriggle. Not quite wanting to let him go, but knowing she could not hold him back, Tori loosened her grip on the puppy. He was quick to scurry out of her grip, snatch up the treat, and fall to his belly so he could munch. His tail thumped the ground several times as he ate. The sight brought a smile to Tori's face; she had not been able to run to town in the few days she had Kitten, so this was the first treat he had gotten while he was with her. 

Tori glanced up when the man spoke to her, and she swallowed slightly. Her eyes raised to his; she felt her wings press together, and immediately dropped her eyes. She would not look him in the eye. She couldn't. 

"That... That would be fine," she murmured, her voice gentle and quiet. Submissive. 

[brianalunsford]

Fox chuckled at the dog, reaching to scratch behind its ears when it had finished the treat, knowing not to put his hand near it so long as it still had food. He normally preferred the large dogs (they were calmer, and less yappy), but the three-legged small variety weren't exactly something he could complain about. This one seemed nice, anyways.

He looked back up to Tori, ducking his head just a bit, so it was lower then hers. The only true way to show her type of person that you meant no harm was to use body language -- a lowered posture, hands staying close to your person, always keeping your head lower then theirs... Well, the last one was, perhaps, more of an animalistic thing then anything else.

But she was a fellow animal, was she not?

"So," he said, the reassuring smile returning, "how are you liking it, with the Cirque, Miss Tori? Meeting anyone new yet? Anything exciting happening? Besides the puppy." The Russian chuckled. "Is cute dog."

[tori]

Kitten liked Fox. 

That was a good sign, she figured. She had heard that animals were a much better judge of character than humans were, and if that was true, then Fox wasn't such a bad person. Perhaps a little rough, but still a decent person. Kitten didn't like too many people, either; he was skittish, much like her. And yet he still wagged his tail as Fox petted him. 

That was a very good sign.

She licked her lips at his question, quickly dropped her gaze. Truth be told, she didn't really know anyone. She knew of a few people, but had only met a handful of the circus performers and roustabouts. And those had been brief "hello, nice to meet you; time to get to work" meetings. Tori could only recall two names, and those would be Mr. Tall and Crepsley. Mr. Tall was their boss, and Crepsley... Crepsley was just well known. 

"I umm..." She hesitated, bite her lip. "I've met Mr. Tall..." Her voice sounded quiet, almost meek, and she gave him a half-ashamed shrug. 

[brianalunsford]

The poor girl didn't know anyone.

Fox gave a little chirp of pity, his expression softening considerably. She was a newbie, yeah, but usually the Cirque folk were much kinder in welcoming new people amongst their ranks -- especially people like them. They knew what it was like to be labeled... well, all sorts of words.

Fox chirped again.

"'Ey, are knowing me, now," he said, softly, lowering his head just a tad bit more. "And promising, am a good friend." The Russian chuckled. "Am thinking so, anyway.

"How about... how about I am introducing you to people, when you are getting time, eh? Sounding good?" Fox's smile widened just a bit.

[tori]

Tori lowered her head slightly when Fox made an odd noise; it sounded like a chirp, but that didn't make sense, given how much of a canine he appeared to be. But the name of the sound made no difference to the young woman, only the emotions carried behind it. There was pity there, something she had only experienced - from other people - once or twice in her entire life. No one had ever really cared about her situation. 

Probably because the only people she knew who actually knew had been her family and her husband, and they were the cause of her pain. They had never dared to care if she had friends; in fact, her husband had purposely kept her away from anyone she might have formed an attachment with. It was just one form of control he had used with her. 

But when Fox spoke, Tori could not help but smile slightly, though she fought hard to hide it. Still, she couldn't stop the light that appeared in her eyes as she looked up at him. She knew she could not afford to gain any emotional attachments with the Cirque, but... But a friend or two would be nice. 

That was why she nodded. 

"That... That sounds good," she answered, smiling gently. "I'd like that, actually."

[brianalunsford]

Fox's smile became a grin.

He was glad, that she had accepted the offer. A girl like her, a shy one like that, did not deserve to be friendless -- it was the shy ones that were normally the kindest, when it came down to it. At least... in his experience, they were.

After all, it was the shy one he had fallen for.

The male swallowed. He knew what it was like to be alone; he still couldn't stand to be alone. Hell, the fear of being alone was what had driven him outside that night, when he knew he needed to be sleeping. And that kind of feeling... He didn't think anyone deserved it, not truly. Least of all someone Mr. Tall approved of -- there was a reason the people in the Cirque were like a family. Their boss had a way with choosing the good ones.

But his grin didn't falter; he couldn't afford to show he was thinking something less then happy at that moment. "Is plan, then," he said, murring contentedly. "What are you saying... Tomorrow night?"

[tori]

"Is plan then."

Tori glanced up at Fox as he spoke, her eyes roaming over his body - not out of perversion or want, but of instinct - once more. The dancing flames had caught her attention during the brief silence that had followed her acceptance of his proposal, and Tori found that odd. Normally her attention was undivided, always locked onto whoever she was in company with. But Tori had relaxed, and let her gaze wander. 

And she had no earthly idea why. Maybe it was because Kitten trusted him, and she, instinctively, took that as a sign to relax. It wasn't like her, though. She shouldn't have been relaxing. She didn't even know this man; all she knew was his name and the fact he appeared to be half animal. That was all. 

"What are you saying... tomorrow night?"

At that, Tori hesitated. She couldn't believe she had agreed to go off with this guy and meet various members of the Cirque. She was... not quite happy, but content with the way she was. After all, being alone meant she was safe. It meant no one could betray her. If she did not trust, there was no true betrayal. And she was okay with that. 

But it was done now, and the young woman had to live with the decision she had made. So she nodded, swallowing her fears, and agreed. 

"Tomorrow night."

[brianalunsford]

Fox's eyes gave a little glimmer, and he wrapped his tail around himself, the expression on his face almost child-like with its satisfaction at this turn of events. He was going to get to show a somewhat pretty girl around the campsite, introduce her to people, just generally spend time with her... Though, oddly, this didn't feel like another of his "conquests". He didn't know why; perhaps it was the way she flinched from him.

Perhaps he was just uncomfortable with taking advantage of that.

Either way, he was sure that she'd open up a bit more after they'd talked for a while. If she was willing to be nothing else, and he could not see anything else in her, she could be a good friend. There was nothing saying that she couldn't.

His ear flicked, thoughfuly, and he stood, his smile becoming warm. "Seeing you then, ptichka."

[tori]

Tori watched as he stood, and did not flinch as he did so. Sure, her body wanted to cringe from him, but she was able to force herself not to. That was... that was something she had never done before. She always flinched whenever someone moved or came near her or did anything unexpected.

And yet when Fox stood, she didn't.

The thought brought a slight smile to her face, and Tori dropped her eyes. Her smile faultered. She didn't want to grow attached to him. She didn't want to trust him, because every time she trusted someone, they betrayed her. And Tori had no desire to be betrayed yet again.

"I'll see you then, Fox..." She murmured, glancing over at him. Her lips curved upward slightly. "Around five..."